Who Will Get the Final Rose?

Bachelor: An Unauthorized Musical Parody – Right Angle Entertainment

After the great success of their parody of the British holiday film, “Love Actually,” Right Angle Entertainment has returned to the Apollo Theater with their new 75-minute musical entertainment that lampoons one of America’s most popular hit TV series. After 25 seasons of tears, laughter, love, rose ceremonies, and more melodrama than you can possibly imagine, dozens of beautiful people have been seen vying for love in this sappy television program. Like every other reality show, this one was ripe for a parody. So here it is—live and in person, featuring a stellar cast of seven topnotch, local actor/singers, all of whom know how to belt out a tune and land a comic line.

For someone (like myself) who’s never watched the show, but knows enough about the franchise from constant appearances on late night shows, daytime talk programs and entertainment segments on the news, the general gist of this satire will be familiar and funny. But for those who don’t regularly watch television, the idea behind this matchmaking TV program is very simple: it’s an expanded, 21st century update of the old Chuck Barris quiz show, “The Dating Game.” 

On every season of “The Bachelor,” a bevy of beautiful young women congregate at a plush, California house that’s been built especially for the TV series. Amid plenty of fanfare, the ladies peck at one another, exposed each other’s wants and weaknesses until they finally meet the handsome, eligible Bachelor. They spend the next several weeks trying to make a good impression on him. 

Throughout the season, the women show their true colors as they go on various kinds of dates with the eligible young man. They often get to travel offsite for dates at exotic, romantic locations around the world. Usually they’re alone with the guy, but sometimes they join him on a group date. Lounging around the California mansion, the women open up about their sad childhoods or their previous traumatic relationships. They sometimes become bitchy with each other, and always end up flirting outrageously with the young man, in an attempt to sway his affections and win his heart. 

After the Bachelor has spent time with each woman, he offers a rose to the ladies whose company he’s enjoyed. They are the women he’s chosen to remain. But he’s also able to thin out the herd by eliminating them each week, one by one. During the  nine-week series, after he’s narrowed the candidates down to two finalists, it’s expected that the Bachelor will propose to his singular lady love. This final display of affection and drama provides the necessary happily-ever-after climax to the program.

In this very funny parody, we first meet actor Jake Elkins portraying Jesse Palmer, a former Bachelor himself and the program’s affable, new host. Because Palmer replaced longtime host Chris Harrison, a running joke throughout this parody is everyone constantly addressing him as “Chris.” Mr. Elkins, who was terrific in Apollo Theater’s recent parody of “Love, Actually,” once again proves he’s a phenomenal comic actor with a tremendous voice. In fact, the entire company is sensational, and every actor is blessed with perfect comic timing and stellar musical talent. Although, strangely, he has fewer songs in this production, handsome Christopher Wayland, who was a hilarious Liam Neeson and Alan Rickman in the “Love Actually” parody, makes a wonderful Bachelor. Throughout the show, Wayland is always suave, amiable and manages to maintain a cool demeanor amidst all the crying, backstabbing and blatantly ostentatious flirting provided by the ladies.

The barrage of women hoping to win the Bachelor’s heart are all played by five gifted and versatile Chicago actresses. Hilariously, all but one of the contestants in this fictitious episode are named Lauren. The single exception is Nina Jayashankar. She plays Jayshia, the beautiful but brainy young scholar who’s also a lawyer. She’s joined by Chelsie Cravens, as the continually melodramatic, eternally tearful Lauren M; Ann Delaney, playing lovely Lauren R, the dimwitted former Miss Rhode Island, who’s dialogue and song lyrics often consist of nothing but “Blah, blah, blah; Alexandria Neyhart, who chews up the scenery as the sexy, but ruthless and sarcastic Lauren T; and gorgeous Cecilia Iole, who plays the sweetly sincere Lauren P, an inexperienced young woman who’s given to expressing herself in malaprops. Every one of these actresses is an American Idol-style belter, as well as a brilliant comedic talent.

The joke-packed script for this parody was written by Richelle Meiss, who also provided the scorching lyrics for the songs. Sam Johnides and Tony Gonzalez not only wrote the tunes for the songs, such as the title tune, “Sob Story,” the “Two-on-One Tango” and “The Date Card,” but they fill the role of the production’s Musical Director. The entire production dances across the stage, thanks to Choreographer Sheena Laird. And the entire show constantly moves at a breakneck pace, due to the skillful guidance and vision provided by Director Tim Drucker. Joshua Warner has designed a versatile stage setting that’s reminiscent of the California estate where the actual show takes place. Mac Vaughey has nicely lit the show and Jessica Sheehan has designed a huge wardrobe of gorgeous, stylish costumes for her cast.

With a television show that was just begging to be parodied, featuring over-the-top characters and witty songs, this is an hilariously entertaining way to both warm your heart on a cold, winter Chicago evening, while offering so many laughs in the process. Men will enjoy all the bodacious babes in this show and women, especially bachelorette parties, will find this the perfect show for unbridled fun. The clever script showcases the talents of an excellent cast, while it provides lot of humor, no matter your level of love for the franchise. Whether you’re a rabid fan of “The Bachelor,” merely a passing acquaintance of the series or, like me, have never watched it, there’s something in this silly one-act musical for everyone. By the final curtain, the one question on every audience member’s mind will certainly be, “Who will get the final rose?”

Recommended

Reviewed by Colin Douglas

Presented January 13-February 13 by Right Angle Entertainment at the Apollo Theater, 2550 N. Lincoln Ave., Chicago.

Tickets are available at the Apollo Theater box office, by calling 773-935-6100, or by going to www.Ticketmaster.com.

Additional information about this and other area productions can be found by visiting www.theatreinchicago.com.